September 21, 1998.

Spent a very idyllic 2 hours in the Whitney Quad, digging the breeze, having lunch with Cranly & catching up with old school Fergusonites: Ben (my ex-over-the-hall neighbor), Michelle, Comrade Jen & Aegis. Someone moved a grungy old couch into the square-U formed by benches, and I'm pretty sure it's the most comfortable place to take one's ease in the entire campus, if not the city of Toronto, if not the world.

Caught up on the gossip swirling around the cast in my drama. A very interesting thing has occurred with Poet, Tiger Lily & myself...2 years ago we were all on the same emotional train wreck, and we've all remained single until this summer. Now Poet's hooked up with what was described to me as a frosh girl (although she's actually in her 2nd year, he's in his 5th year, to give you a little background),

and I have my boy. Makes me seem so normal & respectable, doesn't it? Oh, but appearances are deceiving, as I'm sure Poet & TL would tell you.

Today is a work day for Trevor. I can't stress enough how ridiculously lonely I am. Even when I'm with other people. Even when he's only been gone for a few hours. I'm an utterly smitten kitten, and my thoughts constantly harken back to him in a way I've never experienced before.

This weekend we very self-consciously spoke of marriage only in the abstract. We avoided each other's eyes. This is too soon, this is happening too fast for me. Ask me again in a year, when Q & Pixie Stix's song is reprised for their 1st anniversary.

If the first anniversary is paper, which anniversary is dedicated to the internet?

This morning I awoke at 7 a.m., covered in sweat. I'm not ruling out the possibility that I awoke because of the loud scrambling sound of the mice in my bedroom walls. I guess I'll get used to it.

Speaking of sleep, here's a charmingly embarrassing anecdote about my somnolent activities. On Friday night I slept in Streetsville to make the morning trek to the wedding a great deal easier. Having had very little rest in the last 2 weeks, I went to bed around 9:30. A couple of hours later, Trevor crept in to make sure that his alarm was turned off. I sat up in bed and said, "you're taking this too far," and "go back downstairs." Thinking he'd woken me, Trevor went out quickly, and apologized the next morning. "I'm sorry I woke you up last night." "Huh? You didn't wake me up." "Yes I did." "Um, no you didn't."

I remember nothing of this episode, which is always the case. What a weirdo I am, no?

one year ago today: husked out & hollow