If it were possible for me to take a mental health day, I would be taking one today. As it stands, I have come home early with an unidentified stomach malady. It's partly stress, I know that...but the woman who sits next to me at choir was out for a week with a stomach bug and I was extremely nauseas yesterday, although I tried to choke it down and carry on. It was made worse by my inability to tend to myself: SuperTeacher is a bit of a bathroom cop to me as well as to the students, and she just can't see why I would need to use the washroom at any time other than recess and lunch (thirty years of conditioning was obviously not necessary to her own continence, one assumes). Anyway, I couldn't sleep last night for worrying about the next 3 1/2 weeks, and the combination was enough to undo me this morning. So I handed in my lesson plans and took off for the sofa.
Heh. SuperTeacher was bleakly horrified when she found out how much work she would have to do today. There's a look I'll cherish, having worn it so often at her instigation. She gave me this parting shot: "it's really serious for student teachers to miss days, because when they call for a reference, that's the first thing they ask about." I nodded vigorously, although inside I was crowing. "Like I'm ever going to put you down for a reference. You obviously think I'm a congenital idiot that somehow stumbled through a decayed admissions process-that'll sound great to a school board."
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As you can tell, I'm feeling a bit bleak lately. I'm keeping myself going by fantasizing about the upcoming summer (road trip!) and making lists of the things we can do if we purchase the 88 Mustang (a.k.a. The HMSS Lassitude). Chief among these activities is weekend field trips; although I have lived here for 19 months or so I really haven't seen much of the country except for Halifax (weekend getaway and place of occasional goth dancing), Middleton (site of my last practicum), Canso (site of Stanfest) and the Digby Neck (where our abortive whale-watching venture took place).
I'm not asking for much - maybe a trip to Lunenberg or something. I just need a change of scene. I need to look at interiors other than the school, the university and my kitchen. I need to go some place where I'll know with reasonable certainty that I won't run into a student.
Catching another Shadowplay would also be fun. Hey, I'm not all about the angst. Part of me is about wearing black and feigning angst to a pounding beat.
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1 year ago today: when you're an English teacher, all novel reading becomes work
