may 23, 2002.

Being in my parents' house is a bit weird in some respects. For instance, I have really bad culture lag. When I walk in & out of a bedroom, my first impulse is to close the door to make sure the cat stays out (and sometimes I see phantom floor-height shapes out of the corner of my eye). When I want to call Dirk, I mentally correct for time zones before realizing that he's only 100 km away. It's weird.

So the Boy & I have been fighting about our next destination. On Tuesday he got the word of acceptance from U Man, and on Wednesday the fight began. My problem was that it's easier to talk about moving to Winnipeg when we're next to one another in Nova Scotia - because we're together, right, and all of our friends & family are elsewhere. But when I'm alone in my parent's home or Dirk's haus, suddenly moving to Winnipeg seems like the biggest tragedy since Gertrude drank the wrong goblet.

As a result, I have not been very supportive of the Boy, nor have I been excited about his educational achievement. Things were said last night. Mean things. Things I regret saying and hearing. I called late last night to recant, and tell him that we will go anywhere he wanted if it made him happy. Because after all, this is not worth the wedge between us.

The funny thing is that when he got my message, he was ready to recant and promise to move to Toronto.

So today we're being nice to each other again. Nothing has been resolved, although tomorrow is our do-or-die day. In a way, it's worse to be nice to each other with no decision than it was being nasty to one another with no decision. At least the other way we could yell.

Ah, who am I kidding. I like being nice. And I like it when people are nice to me. Softie.

2 years ago today: the first fetish masquerade