may 2, 2002.

I am insanely bored. Not just today, not just yesterday...it's becoming epidemic. Work is stagnant. Home is eating alone, sleeping alone, and creeping around in the morning so as not to wake up the Boy. Despite a transparent plea, there has been no feedback from readers, except for a helpful comment regarding my piercing woes. The only things I want to do these days are read & write.

At least when I was in the schools, I was too miserable to be bored.

later.

Oh dear. It's official: I have a schoolgirl crush on the church organist. It's the brilliance, the flamboyance, the misanthropy. I developed a taste for those qualities in university and it's been so long since I've seen them in the local population.

(Now that I think about it, those were the three things I enjoy about the Anti-Stephen. Too bad that friendship never panned out.)

I struck up a polite conversation with him after choir practice. He was smoking in the rain and I happened to have a really big umbrella, which was the excuse I needed. The conversation was not particularly remarkable, save that we established a baseline of shared misanthropy on which to measure everything else. He is not flirty, or at least not with married girls he meets in the church choir - I know this because he kept edging out of the circle of umbrella, even though the rain was coming down fast & cold.

When I finally joined the other ladies at Tim Horton's, they asked about the delay.

"I find him intriguing," I said simply. They smirked.

"Now, don't find him too intriguing."

I have the feeling that this is going to be one of those intellectual crushes, the kind that have little or no basis in reality. I can live with that.

4 years ago today: mr. blonde makes out with dot's sister and I pray that it was all just a dream