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instructions:
most links lead to additional anecdotes in pop-up windows.
some links lead to band sites etc. i will be adding to
this account bit by bit as i get the time to write it
all down. too much fun = difficult chronicle to create.
hanging out with samuel johnson must've been as boring
as shit.
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Clubbing
in mostly-empty Garden. Nice
renovations. Pale chatty. Late night.
Tired. Sore.
Horrendous hot crowded tiring commute. Ian w/stories of boogying
authors. Random food acquisition.
Train
ride: hilarious fun, also reading & sleeping. ("Paperclips.")
Team
Hot Dirk Injection Factory hits the rails. I am Job #1.
Montreal
station: eating (German dominatrix). Mount
Gothcon. Photobooth shenanigans. Decision to stay. Beginning
of blues about lack of snazzy clothes.
Team HDIF (a.k.a. Dirk, Stacy, Ian & I) crowd
into a photobooth in the Montreal train station, laughing
even as a creepy guy hangs around our luggage.
Photo by Boothy.
Check
in @ La Tour. Construction of Fort
Sensible. Change of cloths, out to wander. Meet
n' greet (feel surly/sick). Kristen
(pink-haired cutie). Dinner w/Kristen & Matt (Battle Angel
Alita jacket) & Kat. "Is that your real name?" Liquor store:
vodka coolers & absinthe.
Cute little designer on the search for lollypops.
Change
for evening: corset & fuck-me skirt, black & red tights,
PBoJ. Stacy = Lolita. Dirk = admiral jacket. Shots of absinthe.
Venue:
Fashion
show. Boring band (Siouxie redux). Everyone getting sleepy.
Smoking. Bella
Morte (adorable mohawk boys from Virginia)!!! Fun happy
punk show, entranced by lead singer's antics. V. old skool
pit; big bruisers & no grrrls. Free CD's. 99 cent pizza. Home,
finish vodka cooler. ("There is a certain point in unhealthiness
when unhealthy things become healthy.") Sleep on the floor
in Fort Sensible.
Wake. Bagels
in kitchenette. Dress = Bella Morte skirt, new flippy skirt.
Vendors' booths = bewildering choice. Debate purchase of high-heeled
two-tone shoes vs. a pink studded collar. Beseech
Baron von Marcus for advice (delighted to be asked). Purchase
One
Ring of Sauron for Boy. Daniel
Richler is a tremendously charming speaker. Dirk insults
him. Ian looking for sound bites: debate patriarchy & the
Christian church with Death
(skinny lil dreadlocked Chinese-Canadian cutiepie). More contemplation
of vendors.
Wander Rue Ste-Catherine.
Run
into Bella Morte! 15 minutes of hysterically funny conversation
producing such gems as "I mean, Punk Rock!" "Lemon drop"
& "We need our own jerky - Meata Morte!" They enjoy idea
of me as
teacher.
Wandering. Best
Dip Cones Ever. Plan church attendance based on architecture.
Dinner @ diner (aborted canoodling).
Dirk
& Freedom; a marriage made in heaven. Except that one's
a statue and cannot legally wed. Ahh, but love will find
a way...
Stacy
& I - the oft-overlooked Graces of Striped Stockings.
Photo by Dirk.
Little
Bo Peep leads a charge of the sheep.
(I have *got* to stop taking pictures on a slant.)
Change
for evening: PVC pants & pigtail, BM shirt remains. Stacy
= Gothzilla w/Seuss-branch hair. Shots of absinthe ("It brings
us luck." "Damn you for being right!")
our
lady kali of the absinthe. (photo by dirk)
Venue.
Hang in hallway. Boy buys me beer; has to listen to stories
about the Boy. Talking to TO goth. Meet Hilary
(big dick comment) - the
insults begin. Boring death rock. See Bella Morte guitarist;
thank him for afternoon comedy. Dash to smoking area, pushing
boys in puckish glee. Boy follows...introducing Chad (most
stand-up dude ever)! Talk to Chad, the Baron, girl w/Stacy's
voodoo tattoo & various others for hours
in pit, never make it into the venue for more than 5 min.
until time to leave.
death,
pestilence, war & famine - the four horsemen of our own
personal apocalypse, together in the lobby on a saturday night.
Visit
alternate club (ridiculous cover fee). Dance a bit. Sing along
to cock rock (high school nostalgia!). Back to room, one more
shot, decide to bring bottle to afterparty. Go to afterparty
@ con hotel; run into Chad
in lobby. At party conversation remarkably deep & rewarding.
Topics: God, X-ianity, teaching, coincidence, my apparent
age, my bad French. Cast
of 1000's. Yoga in hallway. Begin drinking absinthe raw.
Insult Hilary regularly. A random boy declares his hatred
of me, then leaves.
me & stace on the balcony of 2202 during the
absinthe binge, taken by chad.
we gotta lust for life.
Crowd
into balcony to watch sun rise. Dirk departs; Stacy & I have
another drink. 1 more hour of fun. Stacy wants to go home;
I'm convinced I can find my own way back. She wisely hauls
me out with her. The
BIG insult. Stagger through the streets of morning Montreal
giggling wildly: bottle in hand, waving at cops, hand in hand/arms
slung about one another. (Two
drunks long past last call.) Barely remember to remove
contacts as Stacy chops off stubborn hair. Sleep in Ft. Sensible.
Wake in night to be sick; instead take one aspirin (emptying
PBoJ) & fall wretchedly asleep.
Wake @ 2:30 - completely wretched. Explain all to Dirk.
Decide to break up with absinthe. Find
dolls in sexual congress in bathroom (all deny responsibility
for this).
Dress, lurch out
for food. Turning on Rue Ste-Catherine, feel saliva start
to gush. Vomit
6 or 7 times between 2 dumpsters. Continue, 1000x better.
Deli = pitcher of water, fries & roast beef on rye with
mustard (yum). Eat half.
Return to room;
Stacy & Dirk go exploring. Nap, read, wander out for chips,
get lost. S & D return; drag me out for food. St
Hubert's = magical chicken w/riz soup. Return & dress
for evening: Stacy's Guenivere dress, black opera gloves,
ankh diadem, lace-up stockings, work shoes. Stacy = the
Devil. Dirk = the Devil's advocate.
satan shoots first.
Go to
Fouf's, drink copious amts. of H2O. See Chad, Death,
Kirsta, french Goth Boi. Discover I had made - and then forgotten
- plans w/Chad for afternoon. Chad sings Discordian hymn.
Excellent old-skool punk dj. Run out to dance to "California
Über Alles" - find Bella Morte bassist dancing wildly! Return
to main dancing in time for "Temple of Love." Also: "Safety
Dance," "20th c. Boy" & "Time Warp." (Circle
of mutual admiration incl. me, Dirk, the Baron, Giantess,
random boi). ("I've decided to be a different girl who doesn't
know Hilary.")
famine & the devil, taken by chad. they are
the cutest.
(p.s. neither are in costume.)
chaos
officer chad & gothic guenivere me. we all had our phots
taken with chad. "you're like a monument," i said,
just before dirk took this photo.
me as goth princess, taken by chad.
note diadem, which i had to remove for bouncy punk dancing.
Sit in
happy oldskool punk room, grooving. Talk to Death, who suddenly
decides to pin her new bat to her chest. Get up to dance:
"Lust for Life" - Bella Morte tearing up the impromptu dance
floor! HAPPY
PUNK DANCING! "I Fought the Law" "Blitzkrieg
Bop" "Anarchy in the UK" leads to out-of-control rhinoceros
boy creating actual anarchy -> tailbone bruise for Stacy.
Mosh pit. Depeche Mode cover: punk couples dance (so cute!!).
Cannot stop grinning. Get bear hugs from Andy (Bella Morte)
when he leaves.
Dance
some more. Bid farewell to Death. Walk a stranger to hotel.
Final round of compliments after lights out ("As much as I
love this lady...you are the
Belle of the Fucking Ball.") Sleep in Ft. Sensible.
Glorious waking. Packing. Drop off baggage. Endless
quest for Schwartz's: sustained w/strawberry lollypop. End
up @ the
Main (heartstoppingly good smoked meat sandwiches, cherry
Pepsi, fries & a big pickle). Listen to Leonard Cohen whilst
browsing in bookstore. Visit great
goth stores: Diabolik
& Cruella.
("Where are my lottery flame pants?") Buy pink studded collar.
Wander around; run
into Bella Morte on street! Last round on sightseeing
incl. La Reigne Diabolique.
Return
to train station. Happy,
satisfied farewell.
One
last shot before the temporary dissolution of the Hot Dirk
Injection Factory. WE. ARE. SO. PUNK. ROCK!!
Find
seat in train; begin sleepy
Sybaritic kitten sprawl. Lots of sleep. Nuns wave us on.
 THE BOY!
Best.
Reunion. Ever.
this
time 4 years ago: I decided that one of my dream Jeopardy
categories would be Organizing Stock Rooms
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