January 29, 1999.

"If you open your mouth then I cannot be responsible..."

One of the best things about getting into "Disintegration" now is that everyone around me sings along without thinking about it. Obviously, I missed the memo when I was 14 and depressed...'cause everybody else got one.

I've written a one act play about my Diabolos' experience on Wednesday. Well not really. But if I did, it would look a lot like this:

DIABOLOS!

Starring Saint Stephen! Saint Peter! Guy! Jen! And introducing Amoret (that's me) as GIRL #1!

Scene 1:

BOY #1 - "If either of the boys win, the winner will stop playing the other forever, claiming to be totally victorious."
GIRL #1 - "Why stop there? Why don't you piss on them, too?

Scene 2:

GIRL #1 - "Uhh...and A and an E, to make ALE and MOPE."
BOY #1 - "That's 8 points."
GIRL #1 - "Yeah, but it was fucking elegant."

Scene #3:

BOY #1 - "You can't put VOID there!! It's right under the triple word score!! Don't you have an A?"
GIRL #1 - (growls) "Fuck OFF, I only have consonants!!"
BOY #2 - "I have an A!"
BOY #1 - (in despair) "Now he's going to win!"
GIRL #1 - "So fucking what?
BOY #1 - (mutters) "Back-stabbing Jezebel."
GIRL #1 - "What did you say?!"
BOY #1 - "You heard me."

Scene #4:

(enter BOY #3)

BOY #3 - "Is she playing? She doesn't look like she's playing."
GIRL #1 - "Hey, you want a piece of me?"
BOY #3 - Yeeeeaaaaaah. I'm like Andy Kaufman...I'm the other Jew who wrestles women."

Scene #5:

GIRL #2: "I don't believe in genetic manitpulations."
BOY #3: (happens to be a geneticist) "Take this flowering thing. Pines take a generation to grow. So if we cross one species to another -"
GIRL #1: "Like if we cross a pig and a tree, we get a porcupine!!"
(groans. GIRL #1 is widely ignored)

END. AUDIENCE IS SOLICITED FOR MONEY. CURTAIN.

It's very post modern, don't you think?

An interesting side effect of my obgyn examination the other day: now that I know where my ovaries are, I can locate the dull ache I feel today. Stupid ovaries.

Today I spent an obscene amount of money on an evening gown for Fireball at Fashion Crimes (i.e. a store so expensive that it doesn't bear thinking about). What can I say...there was a 50% off sale. Yes, I was supposed to rent an outrageous costume, but since this dress fits so many events in the next year (i.e. the three upcoming weddings) I might as well wear it to Fireball. I'm such a lame cop-out artist. Cheered up somewhat by the accessory stage: I'm going with elbow-length black opera gloves. The Boy insisted on buying me a black boa, one which matches the one I lost at the Goulash Party Haus during the binge with Javina. Coo-el.

Little Spider also came out, and ended up with a much cheaper dress from Siren...black, of course. You could hardly induce her to wear any other colour. We'll be quite the interesting group at Fireball, that's for sure...what with the Boy in Q's bridegroom getup, LS in a black Ophelia dress, me in gloves, and Dirk in a toga (possibly). I have no idea what Stacy will wear, but I'm sure it'll be good.

If I wasn't so nauseous right now, I'm sure I'd feel a pleasant buzz of anticipation.