Got a couple of things checked off of my list today. Yes, I now have a list - a list of things people have told me to do to seek help about practicum. I also have a log. It's part of my paper trail. And because I may need to refer to it in an appeals hearing, the log is very carefully written with none of my trademark lapses of grammar or good sense. Also, very little use of the word "fucken." Of course, the log also lives in the black n' purple trip journal that is festooned with childish stickers, so it's not all serious. Just mostly.
I think that my faculty advisor will be a great help with this situation (which frankly surprises the hell out of me. I've met him once in 2 years.) He immediately offered to take on my supervision should things come to that point. We have a meeting on Tuesday to discuss the entire situation in detail. In the meantime I took the first official step towards protesting: I met with the director of student placement. He was both sympathetic and unyielding, having utter faith in both my host teacher and my supervisor (and I can't really blame him. If you have a little girl at odds with a former director of the school and a woman considered one of the best teachers in Nova Scotia, who're you gonna believe?)
At the director's...um...direction, I agreed to do remedial sessions on lesson planning with a professor, a situation I find pretty humiliating but one I'm determined to take advantage of. I don't agree that my lessons are inadequate, but they're also not perfect...and extra tutoring sessions will serve the dual function of looking good to those on high and improving my technique.
During the course of the meeting I was given a copy of a letter submitted to the director (seemingly in lieu of an official report), and it lists so many inadequacies that I can understand the director's caution in supporting me. The letter is also greatly exaggerated and downright false in a few places...which will give me lots of material to work with eventually. I thank God that I wasn't given this tripe to approve at the end of my practicum; in the smashed-down ego state I was in after 5 weeks of hell, I would've signed anything and been pathetically grateful not to be booted out of the program immediately.
Once again: it's nice to have self-esteem. It's even nicer to have other people believe in your intrinsic worth as a human being. It's especially nicest to read an entry all about you in your favourite on-line journal. But that has nothing to do with practicum, so never mind.
* * *
Concrete Blonde are playing Lee's Palace this winter and I cannot fucking believe all of the bandwagon jumpers. I mean, I suppose I should just be happy that they're back together at all, but Christ. I have a complete set of recordings, from "True" all the way to "Concrete Blonde Y Los Illegals," the ill-advised hybrid album with the Latino band Los Illegals. I have several hard-to-find singles, including the classic "Caroline" single. I have every solo project Johnette has done, from "Vowel Movement" to "Pretty & Twisted" to "No Talking Just Head." I have suffered through 4 years of very, very boring posts on the official mailing list, just to hear about any news. I saw Johnette open for Paul Weller & I hung out with her on the Heads tour. I know the name of Johnette's short-lived LA art gallery, and I know why her nephew is driving her old car. I have done my time for this band, people.
And yes, I am incredibly cranky that I live in Nova Scotia.
* * *
1 year ago today: "Don't worry, we're still married."
"I know that sweetie," I replied. "I hardly expected you to fling up your hands and run away laughing."
"Wheee!" he said, testing it out. "Nope. Still married."
"Good," I said.
